🐍Toxic Tongue – When Words Leave Lifelong Scars!

Toxic Tongue – When Words Leave Lifelong Scars

To this day, I can still remember hurtful comments that were inappropriate, extremely painful, and deeply insulting. Words people may have forgotten seconds later stayed with me for decades.

I remember being in my early twenties, just starting my education in web publishing. We were in an extremely difficult financial situation, but my mum supported me anyway. Together, we bought a full computer home office. I was incredibly proud - and at the same time terrified. I was so afraid of failing, so afraid of not being good enough to work with it.

When I showed my first website to a female person who was invited to dinner at our home, her comment was: “Hey, du bist doch gar nicht so blöd.”

(“Hey, you’re actually not that stupid.”)

To this day, I don’t understand why anyone would make such an unfriendly comment - especially as a guest in someone’s home. Her words revealed that her idea of me had been that I was a stupid person. That realization hurt more than she probably ever imagined.

Years later, another moment burned itself into my memory. A male person - I don’t call these people friends anymore, and I deliberately use “female or male person” here - said to me, “Du bist nichts Besonderes.” (“You are nothing special.”)

Why would anyone say that to another human being? Every single person is special. Every single one.

Another time, when I was only 25 and going through a very difficult divorce, a female person said to me, “If you can’t find a man, you can always use a sperm bank.”

Why would you say something like that to a young person who is already hurting? Who is already questioning herself, her future, and her worth?

Needless to say, each of these encounters marked the last time I met those people. I distance myself from rude and disrespectful individuals who don’t think before they speak. 

If someone lacks basic manners and the emotional intelligence to be kind, there is no reason to invest time or energy in cruelty disguised as opinion. Life is too precious to waste on disrespect and nonsense.

What I’m trying to say is this: people open their mouths before they think. And they don’t realize how much pain and sorrow they cause. 

One sentence can last a second. The damage can last a lifetime. That is the idea behind my song Toxic Tongue.

The song is not about revenge. It’s not about forgiveness, either. It’s about awareness. About recognizing how destructive careless words can be - and how often negativity is projected by people who are deeply unhappy with themselves.

Be mindful of what you say.

Be mindful of whom you say it to.

And be honest with yourself about why you’re saying it.

Think before you talk.

Because words don’t disappear just because you walk away.

And once spoken, they can never be taken back.