HOW ARE YOU?

“How are you?” When has someone asked you this random, kind, and human question the last time and actually waited and listened to your answer?

A few weeks ago we had an hour video call with my ex-sister-in-law who we haven’t talked to for ten years!!! We were planning my niece’s first visit from Canada to Switzerland and I wanted to make sure that we know everything about my teenage niece's special needs. Even though we are blood-related, she is a complete stranger to us. A Canadian girl was coming to stay with us for two weeks. Canada has a completely different mentality and culture compared to Europe in every possible way. 

During this one-hour video call, my ex-sister-in-law not once cared to ask how are you! She talked about herself, her new husband, and her job, but not once did she care to ask my mother or me HOW ARE YOU? How have you been the last ten years? How have you managed Covid? Are you two ok? Simple human and kind questions.

This got me thinking. When did it become normal to ONLY talk about yourself and don’t give a damn about other people’s well-being? When did it become normal to ignore family members or friends but get back in touch when you need or want something? When did it become normal to manipulate people to get what you want without caring about the other person’s well-being, health condition, life, work, and financial situation?

“How are you?” A simple question! Is it so difficult to be kind and caring? I’m making the same experience with people on Social media. As long as I send DM and ask people how they are, they respond, and usually they are complaining or nagging.

Ever since I stopped sending “How are you messages” to see if anyone actually cares about my well-being, I receive zero DMs. Why? I guess because I’m not beneficial to their needs. As long as people need or want something, they get in contact. Is this human?

Last December, we invited a couple who we haven’t seen for five years for a lovely dinner. We thought it was time to get back in touch after Covid. During Covid, we were texting here and there. Believed or not, not once did the two adults ask us “How are you?”, “How have you been?”, “Are you OK?” NOT once! They only talked about themselves and their travel plans.

I guess this is today's way of humanity in 2023! I hope this blog post reminds you of humanity. It doesn’t kill you to be kind and caring. It doesn’t kill you to be human! It doesn't kill you to actually take a minute and ask people around you if they are OK! 

Today people waste more time on the phone doing nonsense, wasting precious lifetime instead of using it to stay in contact and be there for each other. Liking and commenting on posts on social media have become more important than actually caring about the people you know. Chatting with strangers on Apps has become more important than having honest, open, and simple conversations with family, relatives, and friends.

Remember to ask people how they are and wait to actually hear their answer! Being selfish and self-centered is an ugly habit! 

Stay tuned for my next song release: “MY MISSION Lily Amis feat Thir13een”. A soul/R&B song about today’s lack of humanity in our selfish, shallow, superficial, and two-faced society!