During life, we meet all kinds of people from all kinds of places. Only a few manage to touch our heart and soul. Destiny can be cruel and love can be hurtful and disappointing. Often things don’t turn out the way we wish and our desire for love and devotion is nothing but wishful thinking. We probably never recover from heartbreak and the deep scars remain a lifetime.
Six years ago I met someone special. Unfortunately, destiny and timing were against us. “Please don’t make it hard on me…” was the last thing Zak said before he left! He left without a proper goodbye, neither a hug nor a kiss. He left me back broken-hearted with teary eyes... and I still haven't recovered from that!
Why? Because for the very first time in my entire life I was in Love. Love and being in love are two different pairs of shoes. I know what I’m talking about because I married the wrong man for the wrong reasons. I had no other choice and to this date, it is my biggest regret. If I could turn back the time and speak to my younger self, I would say: “Don’t do it. Listen to your heart and ignore what your mind is saying. Only marry if you are truly and deeply in love”, which I wasn’t at all.
Only a few months later I learned my painful lesson. I wasn’t in love with the man I married, because he was a liar and a cheater. Thank God I had the courage to end the marriage and move on with my life.
However, it took decades until I finally felt what being in love meant thanks to Zak. Even though I know that I won’t see Zak ever again (at least not in this lifetime), this person still has a special place in my heart. Not that I don't want to see him. Not that I don't want to talk to him face to face. But knowing that we have to say goodbye again without a happy ending, would be just too painful for my heart. I can't and don’t want to experience the disappointment a second time. Not ever again. And yet I’m grateful that we met because I finally know how being in love feels like.
Cities, places, and music bring back memories and I will treasure the short days we had forever. There are no accidents or coincidences in this world. And what two people connect doesn’t need to be understood by third parties. We had and have a special connection, even though we live miles apart. And I wish him all the happiness in the world.
Today I share some of the black and white illustrations of Angel of Love & Lily, Zak my sweet inspiration. This love story is available as illustrated book in print on Amazon and in several download stores as an e-book. You find all the links on my website www.LilyAmis.com